Hearts and flowers dominate the items at the checkout counters and you are reminded that it will soon be Valentine’s Day once more. I am in a relationship with an amazing woman with disability, and the idea of going out for a romantic Valentine’s date has been running through my head.
Although I have given this much thought, I was afraid of verbalizing it for fear of being ridiculed or having the idea rejected by my special someone.
I have seen others do this with great success and start wondering if there is some dating secrets they keep up their sleeves to make this look so easy and fun. Having thought about this long and hard, I know I just have to give this a try.
So this is how I did it.
1. First, I had to ask my date if she was up to doing this because she might have some reservations about going out on a real date. There’s no point in going through all the preparations just to know in the end that she is not yet ready to do this. If she has some doubts because of her physical restrictions, then you can put her mind at ease by saying everything will be taken care of and you really should. Your date will appreciate that you asked her thoughts about it and that will also put your worries to rest and be able to better plan for it.
2. I did not focus on the disability, but I have to acknowledge it so I can better plan for what could make the date awkward or impossible. I asked her if she will need special requirements while we are out so we can either bring it or order it. I also had to make sure that I will not be uncomfortable seeing with her in public because that will really be discomfiting and dishonest to yourself and your date as well.
3. I planned ahead. I had to choose a venue that would be able accommodate her wheelchair, and chose a spot where she could sit most comfortably. I took into consideration that she enjoys seeing people come and go and chose a spot where she could the dining area. You should know, however, if your date would just prefer a quiet dinner with you. I had to know in advance where the rest rooms are, the entrance and exits with ramps and most accessible parking slot for disabled. I had to know if she is allergic to some food or ingredients and tell the waiter ahead of time.
4. Lastly, my date and I just went ahead being ourselves and we really had fun and I felt our intimacy bar raised a lot higher. Having done my assignment ahead of time, there is nothing left to do but enjoy the rest of the evening, the good food, a little wine, and the great company.
For me, the real secret here is being sincerely wanting to please your date and going the extra mile to make it count for something. But the most powerful magic of all time that can expose all the secrets big time is being in love with your partner. Nothing could ever beat that, I guess. What can I say, I am a hopeless romantic.